Granny Multiplayer Horror

As Grandma, I'm ready to take on the challenge and keep the neighbor from escaping. With my cunning and experience, I'll make sure he stays put. Here's how I'll do it:

First, I'll use my knowledge of the house to my advantage. I know all the creaky floorboards and hidden nooks. I'll position myself strategically, waiting for the neighbor to make a move. When he least expects it, I'll jump out with my sternest look and a loud, "You're not going anywhere, young man!"

Next, I'll use my trusty knitting needles. Not only can I knit a cozy scarf in no time, but I can also use them to block the doors and windows. The neighbor will find himself tangled in a web of yarn before he knows it.

I'll also set up some of my homemade traps. A few well-placed marbles on the stairs and a bucket of water over the door should slow him down. And if he tries to use the phone, I'll have unplugged it beforehand – I'm not falling for that trick.

Lastly, I'll use my secret weapon: my loud, commanding voice. A good shout can startle anyone, and I've got years of practice from calling my grandchildren in for dinner. "Stay right there, or you'll be sorry!" should do the trick.

With these tactics, the neighbor won't stand a chance. He'll be stuck in the house, and I'll have a good laugh about it over a cup of tea.